Why Would Anybody Who was Raised in a Loving Home be Unhappy About Being Adopted?

sheepby Kali Coultas

Why would anybody who was raised in a loving home be unhappy about being adopted, or opposed to the very nature of adoption?

This was asked to me today in the comments on the “About Me” page I have here. Its a genuine question that I think a lot of people who aren’t effected or maybe even are effected by adoption ask themselves once they come across someone who’s views towards adoption, are similar to mine.

I do not support it. I don’t condone it, nor do I believe in adoption. I have many reasons and I think it will do me some good after this long break to put it into a post and get it into the concrete form of some kind for others to read when wondering why the hell i feel the way I do.

As I have said, i had and still have good parents, adoptive and natural. I wasn’t physically abused, sure my aparents made some mistakes just like all parents do, but nothing to be held by a noose and hung for and not much to blame or hate adoption for.

The little bit being the uneducated state of mind they were encouraged to have and left with after taking me into their care. I don’t support encouraging people experiencing infertility and desperate for a child to adopt. Adoption is not a band-aid for infertility and it never should be. It doesn’t heal someones infertility and putting that responsibility onto a child grieving the loss of their mother is dismissive and not honoring the emotional well being of the child.

When a child is born she/he is attached emotionally and physically to the mother. Everything that child wants, loves and needs is provided for from the mother whom he/she has grown with in utero for 9 months until birth.

Everything should be done to keep these beings together, and poverty although one of the leading factors to surrender, should never be a leading factor to surrender because money never makes someone a good parent.

I don’t believe in adoption because it has become an industry that provides babies to couples willing to pay tens of thousands of dollars for a child. With no care of the child’s well being they have price tags put onto their heads that differ according to race and age. Priority has been put on getting the commodity to make billions annually off of the couples willing to pay, instead of helping the children stuck in foster care get homes. Foster youth are rotting away because they have become least valuable and marketable and so they have been swept under the rug.

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I could have wrote this myself which is why I am sharing it – and check out the website while you are reading – I have a friend who is having his adoption annulled and he is planning to be readopted by his birth family…Lara/Trace


3 thoughts on “Why Would Anybody Who was Raised in a Loving Home be Unhappy About Being Adopted?

  1. I don’t believe adoption ever was about the child – do you? I hope I live to see the day when we adoptees have developed our own language for talking about adoption and do not ‘borrow’ the words of others. The idea of being ‘raped of a baby’ sounds very much like the language one mothers’ group uses in order to emphasize the trauma and loss of adoption, the horror of mother-loss.


    1. No Von, I am thinking it’s about providing babies – not our well being or welfare. It punished our mothers and experimented on babies. Kind of mind control experiment, which sounds radical. Then propaganda washed the brains of adoptive parents who feel mind-drugged being the savior. There are no winners in adoption but the people who make money as facilitators.


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