From the blog THE LIFE OF VON:
I had planned to write about other things this morning, until this story popped up yet again. I am reminded of long ago, when radio was popular and radio serials were much listened to and enjoyed, often by stay-at-home mums, who had lost their right to work when they got married, as was the legislation of the times. If you found yourself to be infertile you were a prime candidate to consider adoption. Male infertility was unknown then, hadn’t yet been ‘discovered’ and men were in for a big shock some years later!
Anyway, one radio* serial began with the lines “For all those who have been in love, and for all those who can remember….”
Married Couple Found to be Twins Separated at Birth – New Adoption Regulation Called For.
This story of love must surely touch the hearts of all who have been in love and all those who can remember*. It is poignant, heart-breaking and tragic in it’s consequences, none of the plethora of feelings, outcomes or consequences the fault of the couple and all of them the harsh and inhumane results of adoption, the falsity of adoption, the concealment of adoption and the cruelty of adoption. The effects of the separation of twins has long been known, as has been the separation of mother and child…those who experience the double whammy of the loss of both mother and twin and then the loss again of their twin, now partner, deserve every possible recompense that can be made. Nothing will compensate for the abuse they have suffered through adoption, but hopefully attempts will be made which will not only acknowledge the damage, but will go some way to assisting them to deal with their new set of circumstances. *http://rememberwhen.u3anet.org.au/?page_id=13
I am reminded too of another of adoption’s abuses – the Chinese father who attempted to sell his triplets on the street because he could no longer afford to keep them. Presumably he would have been prepared to split them up for sale – poverty does that to people! It also indicates the very available free market in children and babies and had buyers arrived before the officials, the babies would have been far away, not placed in an orphanage where they will probably be split up anyway. In a world where people are considered commodities, saleable and where there are always buyers and a market, because greed is paramount and sometimes poverty forces people to do the unspeakable, adoption will continue to look like the ‘clean’ end of the people market.
That is because enormous effort goes into cleaning up adoption – altering records, changing facts, falsifying details, obliterating the truth and ensuring those responsible for the fraud, deception and lies are protected, undiscovered and never have to account for their actions. Sometimes however circumstances find them out and the spotlight is turned on adoption and it’s pimps, it’s perpetrators and it’s purveyors. Those who consider themselves as righteous, law-abiding and acting lawfully and ethically are seen for what they are – abusive in their pursuit of righteousness, their entitlement and in their insistence on what they consider theirs, no matter the cost to others or the inhumanity of what they are insisting upon. Others pursue their role in legislating or ensuring adoption continues as it is, with all it’s faults, abuses and imperfections. Some pursue a role in propaganda, claiming to want to make adoption ‘easier’ – not of course for adoptees!
As in any case or circumstance you care to name, children and their rights come last, trumped always by adults and what they consider their rights and entitlements. I have always found that deeply offensive -how about you?
Von is a good friend in Australia and so often speaks to what I am thinking!!! Trace